<!DOCTYPE html>
<html>
<head>
<meta charset="UTF-8">
<title>Summer Breeze Makese Me Feel Fine by CaffeinaShips</title>
<style type="text/css">

body { background-color: #ffffff; }
.CI {
text-align:center;
margin-top:0px;
margin-bottom:0px;
padding:0px;
}
.center   {text-align: center;}
.cover    {text-align: center;}
.full     {width: 100%; }
.quarter  {width: 25%; }
.smcap    {font-variant: small-caps;}
.u        {text-decoration: underline;}
.bold     {font-weight: bold;}
</style>
</head>
<body>
<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25295722">Summer Breeze Makese Me Feel Fine</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/CaffeinaShips/pseuds/CaffeinaShips'>CaffeinaShips</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Supernatural</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>A Coming Out Story, Dean Winchester - Freeform, Destiel - Freeform, M/M</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-07-16</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-07-16</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-05 11:15:34</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,148</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25295722</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/CaffeinaShips/pseuds/CaffeinaShips</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Team Free Will takes a much needed break in Mexico. A little bit of work, a whole lot of sitting on the beach.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Castiel/Dean Winchester</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>7</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>44</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Collections:</b></td><td>SPNColdestHits</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Summer Breeze Makese Me Feel Fine</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Takes place some time in season 15.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Jesse and Cesar’s house was a little ways back from the beach surrounded by palm trees and the rough, scrubby greenery of the Sonoran Desert. The Gulf of California gently rose to meet the desert and gently fell away with delicate waves. The heat was persistent and intense, but the move of the water, and the green of the plants who flourished there seemed to absorb the heat and temper the air somewhat. </p><p>The house was one story and made of stone and tile. It sat in the shade of the palms, the cool night air seemed to radiate off of the structure until sunset. The house always seemed to have a cool breeze blowing through. Dean could not figure out where the breeze came from and Cesar refused to tell him. </p><p>“When you know a place like the place is a member of your family you know how to work with it.” was all he would tell Dean. </p><p>There was a flat piece of driftwood over the door of the home into which Jesse had roughly burned the phrase “Paraíso del Esposo”.</p><p>As Jesse, Cesar, Sam, Castiel, and Dean sat in chairs on the beach drinking small glasses of local spirits they had to agree that this was paradise. Each felt the heavy burdens of memory that they carried lighten a little as the heat from the sand mingled with the cool sea breeze and gently brushed away their stress. They listened half attending as Jesse and Cesar described the job.</p><p>When Jesse had called Sam and Dean had been skeptical. There was a lot going on at the time. Jesse explained that there seemed to be a haunting in the local town. Scratches showing up on people, things moving on their own, windows breaking, that sort of thing. No one was seriously hurt yet, but you know ghosts, it’s only a matter of time. Of course Cesar and Jesse could handle it by themselves but… they didn’t want to. They were done ending someone’s dead sister, or mother, or kid. They were done with other people’s sad stories and dark secrets. They grilled peppers outside now. They fished in their front yard, made ceviche, and ate it with their feet in the water. But, like they said, no one was getting badly hurt just yet, so take some time, and when they had a moment, would the Winchesters please pop on down and clean out their little town. </p><p>At first Team Free Will dismissed the idea outright, but after a day of pacing around the bunker they changed their minds. Chuck was in the wind, the world was going to end, and they had no leads. They felt the incredible pressure to save the world, but had no idea how. It was time to get out of the bunker, stretch their legs, clear their heads, and start fresh. They grabbed their salt and gasoline and took the drive down to de-ghost their friend’s town. </p><p>The ghost was real. Of course Jesse and Cesar knew what they were talking about. It was someone’s father, and dispatching it was easy but sad. When their task was completed Team Free Will assumed they would turn right around and head home, but Jesse and Cesar talked them into staying the night. It was late and they were tired, so they did. They sat, watched the waves, and drank their drinks. </p><p>The next morning over eggs they talked Team Free Will into staying one more day. They argued that it might help to rest a little and then hash out the apocalypse over dinner. After a day of catching up and fishing they somehow managed not to discuss the apocalypse at all. A strange oversight. So it seemed only sensible for everyone to stay one more day. Jesse and Cesar made no effort to hide the fact that they were talking around ‘tricking’ Dean, Sam, and Cas into taking a short vacation.  Dean, Sam, and Cas barely tried to pretend they were being talked into it. Relaxation seeped into their bodies and settled their minds. </p><p>They had now passed another full day staying with their retired hosts and still had not managed to discuss the problem at hand. Sam was stretched out on the couch snoozing. He’d spent the day with Cesar and Jesse’s extensive library of local lore, but after a big meal and a few drinks he’d been distracted by the lull of the sound of the waves and allowed his eyes to close. </p><p>Cas was wandering the property marveling at all of the life. He was developing something of a fascination with desert life. Each adaption to the inhospitable climate was a miracle of life’s determined flexibility. He stood at the edge of the ocean observing the life that chose to stay in the ocean rather than reach for the shore like some of the more ambitious species had. The original launching place of life, the ocean, meeting one of the most difficult places to build a life, the desert, moved him. </p><p>Despite the heat Cesar, Jesse and Dean had made a little fire on the beach and were taking turns poking it with a stick and feeding it little bits of wood. In the time honored tradition of men who wanted to do some honest chatting they turned to fire to give them a job, something to look at other than each other, and an excuse to sit still and talk quietly. </p><p>For reasons Dean couldn’t even remember he had found himself telling them the sad and disorienting story of finding otherworld Charlie, bringing her back, her restlessness, and her tragic love. Now the 3 sat quietly poking the fire while the subject of tragic love hung in the air. </p><p>“And what about you and Sam? Any time for love amid the crisis?” Cesar asked, using a stick to poke a smoldering log back toward the flames.</p><p>Dean provided them a short rundown of Sam and Eileen. Another tragic love hung in the air.</p><p>“And you?”</p><p>Dean considered. </p><p>“You know, I’ve faced the end of the world with only Sammy for comfort so many times I kind of got used to assuming that when my time came I wouldn’t mind dying without a partner. But now that the time is creeping up… You know, I think I’ll be sad to not have a real love at my side. I came close a few times. I just… I guess none of it was meant to stick. You know?”</p><p>The feeling of tragic love hung in the air.</p><p>“No last plays in mind? No diving for home plate? Nothing you can’t imagine leaving… unfinished?”</p><p>Cesar sat back in his chair and sipped his drink. The moment stretched on for a minute.  </p><p>“You know…” Dean began and trailed off for a second. “There are things… things I was willing to die without knowing. There were these things, stupid things, that seemed so important. Things I thought I was willing to defend to my grave. Things like, what it means to be a man, or what people judge you for. Things it took me a long time to realize… that, those may not be my things, you know?”</p><p>Cesar and Jesse stared at the fire. They gave maybe the most imperceptible head nods. They did know. They said nothing.</p><p>“Sometimes I’ll think… ‘that was girly’ about something some other man does, and then I’ll stop and ask myself, ‘why do I care?’ And I don’t. You know, I don’t. It wasn’t me who believed those things. I just got told them so hard, and so many times, I assumed they were real. I thought they were… beyond questioning. But they aren’t mine. They never were. I spent so much of my life not thinking certain things, not looking at certain people. So many missed opportunities because of some other man’s ideas about what men do. Now that the world is ending again, It feels like a waste. You know?”</p><p>“Well”  Jesse poked the log again and they watched it ignite into flame “You got a little time at least. How would you like to spend the time you got?”</p><p>Dean sipped his drink and considered for a minute. </p><p>Cesar and Jesse said nothing. Getting Dean to go where he needed to go in this conversation was like feeding a wild bird out of your hand. It had taken them years of patience just to get to this moment. One rash move, or inadvertent twitch, and he’d fly. They were both quite sure that if he spooked himself he’d never have this talk with them again. They rested, they tended the fire, and they waited. They had all night for fire and drinks.</p><p>“You know, I think I want to try something real. I want to be honest about what I want just once in my life. Even if it’s just for a few days, or a week. I want to know I tried, at least.”</p><p>“This ‘something real’ got a name?” </p><p>Jesse asked with the practiced cool of someone who has interviewed many a skittish person who might be afraid to say what they knew to be true. Usually it was some monster they had seen, but scared was scared, and Dean had been scared his whole life. </p><p>“I think he does” Dean murmured almost to himself.</p><p>Castiel stood in the shadows out of site, watching the tiny creatures drifting in the waves and eavesdropping. He was aware the humans considered overhearing conversations to be rude, but with the strength of his hearing he had become pretty adept at listening and pretending not to have heard. Angels don’t need to breathe per se, but he was holding his breath anyway.</p><p>“Did I ever tell you” Dean asked casually “That we once went to another universe where we were actors playing ourselves on TV, and Sammy was married to the woman who played the demon on the show who started the apocalypse in real life?”</p><p>Despite themselves the two men sat up straighter in their chairs.</p><p>“No, I don’t believe we heard that one.” Jesse replied.</p><p> It sounded like a hell of a weird story and both men hoped they’d get to it at some point.</p><p>“I’ve been thinking about that a lot lately. About where all this supernatural crap starts and stops, and where people are just people, trying to live lives the best way they can.”</p><p>“You're not looking to end the world with a demon are you Dean?” Jesse teased.</p><p>“Exactly the opposite, I think. I’ve been wondering. If a being’s been human, and a being’s been celestial, and being’s been dead and brought back to life more times than I care to count, when does that being stop being something otherworldly, and start being... just another being?”</p><p>“You’ve got your eye on a being in a trench coat”. Cesar stated factually, poking a log and watching the sparks fly</p><p>Dean smiled into the fire despite himself.</p><p>“There are worse ways a man could end the world”</p><p>Cas stood frozen. Dean wanted him for something… more. Something different. Dean spoke of love, and of partnership while speaking of Cas. Castiel felt a strange giddy sensation in his body as he watched two ants carry a fallen comrade away from the waves and toward their nest. Cas’s body felt puzzlingly warm, and he felt like running, and yelling, and laughing, and singing all at once, but he could only manage to hold himself perfectly still. He was happy, he realized. Really, truly, deeply happy!</p><p>There was the smallest sound like someone snapping bubble gum. Dean’s first thought was of Cas. He looked around but couldn’t see the Angel anywhere. Dean turned back to the fire and didn’t worry about it. He knew Cas was around somewhere. And if he wasn’t he would answer Dean’s prayers. For that moment Dean wasn’t worried that he would never see Cas again. He wasn’t desperate to find him, willing to ignore even the apocalypse to track him down. He wasn’t thinking that he would have to face the end of the world without his Angel. Dean didn’t give a thought to the possibility that Cas could go missing. For this moment at least Dean was content to stare at the fire and sit with what he had finally said out loud.</p><p>“Are we ever going to talk about how the world is going to end? Or are you three going to have to move in here?” Jesse finally put the topic on the table.</p><p>It was time to hash out the important stuff. To catch them up to date on the real work that needed doing. Dean put Cas out of his mind (to the side really, Cas was never far from his mind) and got down to the business of saving the world.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Please don't ask me why Jack isn't in this story. While I was writing it I just kind of forgot he existed.</p></blockquote></div></div>
</body>
</html>